"I shall call him Squishy, and he shall be mine."

If you don't know what that is from, please put the bran muffin and metamucil down. Immediately ask the nearest juvenile delinquent where to find this mysterious place called "Toys'R'Us", get there. Your mission upon arrival is to stay there until you find yourself doing things the midgets are doing, like riding the tricycle up and down the aisles or being the irritating brat pressing the buttons on everything so all of the dolls are screaming and you think it is funny!!!! Then rush to the Disney store (be careful not to break a hip, you may want to purchase a push toy and some milk) and stay there until you can randomly apply quotes from the movies to your life or just b/c you can!

Anywho, the original intent was a list of random thoughts I have and as usual got sidetracked by other random thoughts. I think that is fairly entertaining though. Btw if you really do eat bran muffins, and actually enjoy them w/o sugar, chocolate, ice cream.... I would recommend going trick or treating regardless of the time of year. That sounds like an awesome idea, I want to do that for Christmas. I'll dress up like an orphan or an elf and go trick or treating for anything but egg nog, that is the most heinous drink ever!

So here are some random thoughts:

- Group projects are absolutely, positively,  awful! They are nothing like real world, big people, job group projects! Regardless I believe they should come with access to:

• an open bar
• something you can beat the crap out of something like a mannequin you can draw or tape a face to would be fantastic, even better would be realistic bruising or blood, better than blood fill it with bloody mary or strawberry daiquiri. It may sound harsh but better that mannequin that that group member!
• A soundproof room where you can yell, scream, jump up and punch the air, shout a string of dirty words and just really speak your mind w/o judgement. This should probably have the mannequin in it and also not allow people to see in either...I think those reasons are pretty self-explanatory and quite obvious

- People who take surveys and think they are the best thing since sliced bread, putting birthdays like 666 or that they mate with sea horseys and are romantically involved with sebastian the crab, should get pimp slapped by the paper or computer. Like some kind of 007 stuff that can detect douchary such as that and say "Ha hahaha!!!" *pimp slap* "Looks like the joke's on you succkkkaaaaa!! Booyah!"

- C-3PO should really exist, or better yet the robot from "Meet the Robinsons"! That would be epic, bff, maid, landscaper and so much more all in one! What more can you want and it can probably be paid in sunlight if you get optional solar charging, like wall-e has!

- Who the hey sits around and thinks of all of these crazy different formats for writing papers, citing works and such? It's like really, you have nothing better to do but make other people's lives hell? Oh great thanks man, you're so not invited to anything cool you loser of life!

- OWL @ Purdue, please tell me why you are 2 years out of date so now I have to go through a PP of how to properly format something APA? "You are the weakest link! Goodbye."

- BS and BA, guess what they really mean! I'll give you a hint:  What did you immediately think of last time somebody said "This is BS!!!"? I'm going out on a limb here, but I'm going to guess it was not 'bachelor of science'....

Well guys since I have a shitzu and not a robot I have clean up after both of us instead of him cleaning up after me....

TTFN, can't wait to see you Ray Ray!!!!

No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have, and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!

Good thing I never said which tomorrow!!!! Technically the video was made the day after the last post, post-production was tedious an took longer than anticipated! However, I do believe it is AWESOME.

The title is a Disney quote from "The Great Mouse Detective", so still sticking with the plan! I am excited about upgrading the technological aspect of this video, and likely others as well. Cannot wait for Ray Ray, I want to make the Tosh video. I'm pretty sure we could win this thing. I am also excited for us to go eat octopus, grill smores, make smoothie drinks and have a blast. I think we should get all dressed up for it too, as well as for the first day of school!

Without further ado, I present video #2! Please comment!!!

"Be prepared for sensational news....just listen to teacher!" "Be prepared!"

Prepare for an all new video tomorrow! It is my gift to you, hopefully you will be able to benefit from it.

PS:  Laughter is a benefit!

PPS:  Let's see how many of these titles we can make Disney themed starting with this one. If you don't get the title, go grab a juice box, your fave blanky, ask permission and watch some Disney kid!

Surprise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I finally did it! I did not realize it would be so long!!!!! I meant to do other stuff in it too but oh well, next time. I have some of my infamous rants in it.... Enjoy

Feedback greatly appreciated!!!

Too much for just one....

So....Here's the Second!

Dear JJ

I'm sitting at a hotel lobby in Cyprus, using their wifi. I didn't want to go down to the lobby, so  I tried to mooch off of the neighbors.  It worked for approximately 10 minutes, when I guess they got one of those intruder alerts and decided to kick me off.

There are tons of British people in the lobby with me, screaming bloody murder at a tennis match, onf the big screen TV. Apparently, it is really important. I think you would find this really funny.  I'm ranking screaming british accent the second most annoying accent, only under that of drunk Irish which I encountered last week.

Of coarse when I try to get on the wifi down here there is a password.  At first I tried entering the hotel name, but it didn't work. I then ventured over to the desk to ask what it was.  I hate doing this because then they figure out I'm American and they want to talk to you for 20 minutes about while your there.  Eventually I'm going to start making up some crazy story, other then telling them I'm a student.  

When I get the password it's a series of numbers, and I really can't read the guy's handwriting very well. The twos looked a lot like eights.  So after three password attempts, success.

There is no need for life to be this difficult.

 I have emailed my Mom, and am waiting for her reply.  Just as I was typing that sentence a very handsome and muscular British man walked through the lobby. FYI.  And now I am writing you a letter.

The muscular man just walked through the lobby again. He knows greek, so he must be Cypriot and not British. My bad.  You would find him attractive.  He would be the Roger to your J Woww for a metaphor.  I bet he might be a life guard, but then again I thought he was British at first. Maybe he'll walk by again.

There is a huge library of books in the lobby.  I'm thinking about getting one to read tomorrow, and I'm even contemplating stealing it and bringing it back home to Tennessee.  That would be quite the adrenaline rush, or not.  Stuff here is expensive, and it would be a cheap souvenir.  I would put it on my shelf, and people would be like "ohh wherever did you get that book?"  and I would be like I stole it from this hotel this one night because these British people screaming at Wimbleton drove me crazy.

It would be a good story.